Once a week all the student teachers in the Salt Lake area get together to provide support to one another while we struggle through our student teaching. There are some student teachers in the group who admit to struggling while building relationships with the students and it got me thinking.....
On an episode of 'The Office,' Michael Scott is quoted as saying "Would I rather be feared or be loved? Both, I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." Sometimes I feel like this. How come I have to make the students fear me to respect me? When I tell people that the students really like my class, and seem to enjoy me as a teacher, they act as though I must have no control over my class, and my students must not be learning. Why can't the students enjoy me as a teacher and still respect me?
I honestly feel like they do.
I've had this internal struggle before. While growing up I had some really good Young Women's leaders. The girls in my ward built relationships with these women and trusted them with our deepest teenage secrets and in return they shared their love and advice with us. Because we had a FRIENDSHIP (that's really what it was, it was more than a teacher/student relationship) we called these women by their first name. It was suggested that the girls in the ward were not showing respect to these women because we didn't call them by "Sister.........." I honestly do not feel like this showed any lack of respect towards these women. The women that I knew who were lovely women but did not share this relationship were refered to as "Sister .......... " Sure I respected those other women but I didn't care for them the way I cared for my first name basis leaders. So is it impossible to like someone and still respect them? I don't think so.
So why does everyone freak out when I suggest that my students like me AND respect me?
5 comments:
Good points. I hated that the young women had to call me "sister" when they all wanted to call me Kirsten. And we were all friends. I think you can do it!!! If anyone can you can!
I had this struggle when I was teaching ballet too. I totally agree with you that you can have your students both like and respect you. Those who I liked AND respected were my favorite teachers...who also were the teachers of my toughest classes!
I didn't even think about the value of calling the YW leaders by their first names---I really like that we did (while I was in Utah).
amy you are exacctly right. the bond we had with our leaders was nothing short of inspiration. they didnt let age, class, or calling get in the way of knowing us. as i look back, ive never had a happier time. it also reminds me of to kill a mockingbird... his kids called him atticus, and while thats controversial... i always envied their relationship with him. but we had that with our leaders, and i know you will be an awesome teacher! you have the great ability of relating...and in the most non judgemental yet spiritual way. i love you amy, you're awesome!
caro
You radical child. You must have had a wild, rowdy mother. I never cared what people called me as long as they didn't call me late for dinner. Love, JOMAMA
Post a Comment